the ramblings of a chronic over thinker

accept that accepting might be hard…

i wish it was this easy… or maybe it is?

“Acceptance doesn't mean resignation or giving up; it means acknowledging reality and finding a way to work with it. It's about being present with your experience, even the difficult parts, without judgment.  Acceptance, in its core meaning, is the acknowledgement and consent to something, whether it be an idea, a situation, or an offer. In psychology, it often refers to recognizing and embracing a situation without resistance, even if it is painful or undesirable. This can involve acknowledging and allowing difficult emotions or circumstances to be present without trying to change or avoid them. “ -the internet, vis-à-vis, a bunch of smart humans

it starts with you

maybe not all of my readers know that this year, 2025, freshair lost four employees. for various reasons, the relationships built here at 542 A came to an end. it’s not easy dealing with issues, conflicts and situations, but it’s also, not hard? i don’t want to denigrate the fact that yes, operating a business with fewer service providers than needed to stay afloat is hard. it’s actually stressful, scary, pathetic, weird and downright annoying. but it is life. it is my life.

i have been in the beauty industry for over 25 years and i can say with honesty, that comes with heaps of acceptance. to be fair, i think that living life comes with acceptance. sometime last year while working on the course and going through the early stages of menopause (yeah, i said it. i’m 46. it’s real). i began to understand the process of acceptance. i am a person that likes to take control of the things i can. i have crazy discipline and i don’t break promises to myself (i used to in my younger days, now i make a point to make promises to myself i KNOW i can keep). all of this is accepting myself. i understand that i am a little tough. i have high standards, i love kindness, i love laughing, i love eating, i love staying in shape and feeling strong. i talk a lot, i love action films, i am uber curious and i love a good detail. i have accepted so many things about myself in the past 12 months and it’s funny how, even now when i am struggling to find hair stylists who want to work together, i am faced with acceptance.

since covid we have been looking to hire stylists and managed to get a few. due to the climate of the world right now, the odds are for sure against me and i feel it. but then what? what can i actually do? if no one applies to work and we can’t find a way to get more bodies in the chairs, i’ll need to accept the fact that my business isn’t able to run in the way it was originally intended to. that really sucks, but at the same time, this is life. my life. i accept it.

i am aware that this post is a little saddening, but it is the truth. i accept it. many things have transpired in the 15 years my shop opened till now. many things have changed. i have changed. it’s okay, i’m accepting it and i am moving on. i have so much other things going on in my life and my career is just one part. this job is a part of the totality of ME. feels good to share and if i can give y’all some advice on acceptance? start with accepting yourself, the good and the bad. this helps prepare you for the other stuff. like night sweats and pasty breath. it prepares you for bad news and unwanted attention. i am officially in my acceptance era, and it feels okay.

now i’m going to go outside, practice my ball handling and shooting (yes, i play basketball now 🙄). getting outside is actually great for accepting things, except when it’s smoky out, stay inside and accept indoors.

✌🏾

-p

p.s.

i also love jokes! if you want to share some here, i accept! 😉

the ramblings of a chronic over thinker

started from the bottom now we where??

clearly at the top! using gold to lotion is a sign of wealth, right?

not familiar with the drake song? started from the bottom now we’re here! here meaning the top! the pinnacle! success! “look ma we made it!”

I done kept it real from the jump
Living at my mama house we'd argue every month
*Playa, I was tryna get it on my own
Workin' all night, traffic on the way home
And my uncle calling me like, "Where ya at?
I gave you the keys told you bring it right back"
*Playa, I just think it's funny how it goes
Now I'm on the road, half a million for a show

so if you’re not a drake fan, or familiar with the song, it’s cool. it’s really just a statement of success and stating how far one has come to reach the top. but what is the top? what is success?

i was in a great conversation about success and we concluded that success isn’t the top. success is the amount of times you slipped off the top and then had to climb back up again. that’s one of the real meanings in my humble opinion. the ability to KEEP going no matter what comes or what goes. we start to believe that ‘making it’ is all we need to be focused on. the reality is, making it and continuing to stay positive, in spite of life/living, is what we should be pushing as a narrative. “look ma, i made it!”, is great and everything, but believe me, you’re not going to just get to coast after that. trust that things get more complicated when you have a view from the top.

feels amazing!

i definitely feel like i have reached ‘success’ here and there a few times, and it felt amazing, it felt wonderful, it felt good! i have also slipped off my ‘top’ probably more than i reached the top, but i’m still here, enjoying every slip, slide and climb. i wonder if jeff besos slips here and there? i mean, he IS human right?

✌🏾-p

*replaced the derogatory word

the ramblings of a chronic over thinker

do we have enough time for this?

that’s a lot of time!

there’s a misconception about salon services that i would like to address with this post. if you look closely at our pricing, you should notice that, apart from experience, time is the factor that will cost you. the longer a service, the more it will end up costing. when you’re looking to book an appointment, ask yourself some simple questions like, what do i really want? how long am i willing to sit for? can i afford it?

one huge hang up is colour transformations. if you have jet black hair and you want it ‘blonde’ but only have 3 hours to spare, no, not good. you should be booking a COLOUR CORRECTION because there is more time with this service than a FULL HIGHLIGHTS service. when it comes to lightening hair, we offer the three hour spot to accommodate a basic colour service. but if your hair is really thick, long, or super dark, that time might be more like 5 hours! maybe you don’t need a transformation, maybe you just need a retouch of your highlights but your hair is really thick AND long. you’ll probably be spending upwards of $300+ on your mane and at least 3 plus hours in the shop.

these cornrows took 2 hours

this updo took an hour

these highlights took three hours

have you ever noticed the timing on our services when you book online? for example, in our shop, the service BLOWOUT is 45 mins and the service BLOWOUT AND PRESS is 90 mins. the timing for the blowout is a placeholder and MOST hair types work with this length of time. if you have super thick long heavy hair, that 45 min blowout you booked could be 60 mins! in our shop, after the first appointment, we do our best to adjust your service for future appointments.

all of this to say, pay attention to the timing a little more than the pricing. i’ve seen a few bookings where a 90 min service time booked a 45 min service time because the cost of the shorter time service was more favourable. that’s tricky because you and you 90 min hair want to pay less and complain if the service provider isn’t quick enough! what? not cool.

we want to make sure that you are getting the service you need at the time that works best. honestly, if you’re concerned, book a consult. it’s 15 mins (not much time) and will help clarify any confusion about time and price. remember, good things take time, sometimes even your hair!

✌🏾 -p

the ramblings of a chronic over thinker

can you believe it?

counting down the days

november is here. we have this month and another before we wrap up 2024. it has been an interesting year and as a business owner, there was some good and a lot more bad. as a mom and wife, there was a lot of good with some bad sprinkled in. what should be my focus? does one perspective hold more weight than the other?

the year is coming to an end and i’m reflecting through two different lenses. through the business lens, it’s been tough and i foresee at least 3 more tight years ahead before my perspective can shift more positively. through the personal lens, 2024 was good. only a few accidents, no deaths and all my loved ones are happy and mostly adjusted, heavy emphasis on the mostly. i mean, we still have eight weeks left so maybe i should cross my fingers?

i suppose this two way view is quite common for most of us. there’s an intersectionality here that makes issues sometimes contradictory. prices need to go up (business lens), but my kids need food and to engage in social activities (personal lens). higher prices on the personal side are very stressful because i aim to try to give my children a life not just similar to mine, but better. when i was making minimum wage it was $5.25/hour. now it’s $15+/hour and it’s still not enough to live well, not to mention to raise a child! personally, this christmas will be interesting once it’s all said and done. ‘businesslly’, i’ll be happy to wrap up 2024 and move on.

depending where you stand, what do you see?

i’m practicing acceptance and leading by example. these traits, i hope, should guide me pretty well while i wear both hats. i can accept the changes (rising costs) and lead by example (sell more products) in my business. i can accept the rising costs of food and goods and try to adjust my lifestyle (maybe start a garden or get some chickens?) and i can lead by example at home by doing my best to maintain the rules and regulations i set in my home.

it’s difficult to manage contradiction in any way but maybe also not so difficult?? i don’t know the answers guys, i just keep coming with the questions.

✌🏾

-p

the ramblings of a chronic over thinker

salonscale is here!

for you newer readers, freshair is in the middle of a business re-org. since the pandemic, many business have been in a full on slump. from lack of employees, to rising cost of goods, it’s tough. businesses are closing, and this is the time to make some decisions in the new landscape of supply and demand. we have signed up for a business course to expose the leaks in our financial bucket. this week, i introduce salonscale!

it is a new software that helps salons keep costs low in regards to services that uses products. for example, colour or highlights. we mix up your shade and apply, you pay, you love, you leave. the issue is that most employees over mix or under mix and over charge or under charge for this ‘usage’ part. salonscale is promoting transparency with product usage and because we weigh the products used to do the service, you only pay for what you use. nothing more. if you have fine hair and use less, your ‘usage’ should reflect that.

this ethical and transparent way to keep track of the usage, benefits the salon because now we can weigh the products used and then order just what we need. the software tracks the usage and if used properly will reduce waste, and keep the cost to my client steady.

can’t see through this, what’s going on?

we are hoping to roll it out sometime in the next few weeks so if you are coming into the shop and get a balayage or a root retouch, you might notice a few changes. the amazing thing i love about the software (apart from the savings part) is that it records what you used for the service and it is automatically saved so the same amount can be mixed again!

i was a little hesitant to share this with everyone but in the vein of transparency, i think it’s important to know. especially for my clients and patrons of our shop. many folks don’t know what goes into every service and style and we want all of you to be educated. it’s exciting to see the hair industry step up and provide some support to the back end of our business. if you have any question, hit me up. if you’re a stylist and have questions, hit me up too!

upwards and onwards!

-p

the ramblings of a chronic over thinker

money, money, money, money

get into my account!

wow you guys! what an amazing response to my message last week! i don’t think i’ve ever had that much engagement on here! whoo! also, big thanks to all the readers who emailed and even gave some ideas for what i can write about as this progresses. i’m blown away by all of your supports! many thanks.

this looks like njerep…

this week i’m working on the financial statements for fresh. documents like profit and loss, balance sheets and cash flow statements. all of it is swahili (shout out to my african readers).

::: side bar :::

why do we use swahili as the word to say that i don’t understand something? i wonder why it’s swahili and not gaelic or njerep? i mean, why can’t we just say, ‘i don’t get it’? ALSO, maybe it’s swahili because i’m 45 and that’s what i heard growing up and it was a common term used to say, ‘i don’t get it’. yeah, that’s probably it.

::: side bar closed :::

i know that this is one of the ways i can improve my business but it is DRYYYYYY. it is BORRRRRING. it is ‘not a waste of time’ but feels like it is. all of the columns with money going in and money coming out is a lot. bank service charges? CRAZY! salon supplies and sundries? that seems like it goes up every month (things cost more, we all know that). wages and salaries? cost of goods sold? professional fees? i could keep going. i won’t.

these bankers are pumped to help you!

it does make me realize though, how badly i am in need of this understanding if i want my business to succeed at all. business is like a formula with an amazing equation. revenue-cost of goods sold= profit. seems pretty straight forward but then….

when i opened freshair, i had no idea about any sort of business sense. i knew i needed bookings (revenue) and that my staff and products used (cogs) would be deducted from the bookings and tadah! richie rich! ok, i didn’t think i would be instantly rich, i just thought that was it.

hustle hard, closed mouths don’t get fed on the boulevard (ace hood lyrics)

well, things went badly and 5 years in, i took a business course and it helped me understand the real process of that equation. i learned about taxes (folks, pay your taxes). i learned about banks and lenders. i learned that when it comes to money, the structures that support this country are really relying on you not knowing anything when you open a business. they are banking (you like that double entendre) on you figuring it out as you go so that they can capitalize on your lack of understanding. i know this, because i lived it and i am currently working it out.

what if there was a different structure? what if there was a way that we could be vetted BEFORE opening a business? maybe just a course about what you’re about to get into? like gun ownership or a drivers license? wouldn’t it be cool if that was an option? maybe i would have never pulled the trigger on this shop if i began with more knowledge about the way REAL business works in a capitalistic culture. maybe i would have found something else to do?

i just know that this system needs help. from the documents i mentioned earlier, to the banks and lenders, it’s flawed. maybe next week i’ll talk about my idea for business fund raisers like a go fund me but not? it’s bizarre…stay tuned. i’m just tired of the banks and their ‘no solutions’ all they want to do is give me loan which solves nothing. what about angel investors? yipes! don’t get me started on that! next time… next time.

-p